Monologue

Would you look at that?

Last post published on the 7th of July, 20008. *clicks tongue* Shame on you, Mil. There goes the pipe dream of writing everyday.
So, alot of things happening here in the land of KL. Anwar got arrested, roads got blocked, people get riled up and other people don't give two spits. I'm not sure which category I belong to, all I know is that who are we to judge this poor guy who is under extremely public scrutiny. Boy would I get plastic surgery if I were you, Mr. Ibrahim!

And of course, alot of things happening in the Sadhwani household, nothing new, nothing new. I feel underappreciated, trodden on, happy and frustrated all at the same time but eh, life goes on.
So, ahm. I have no privacy left. Yep, people come in and out of my room daily, to take showers, to play computer games and once in awhile poke and prod through my stuff as if they own everything but surprisingly I'm taking it in calmly.
It was only today as I sat down in my room and looked around that I realized that it bugged me to hell and back. Eh, I can't call anything my own anymore, I thought to myself.
My drawers have been open, my table has been touched, my shower has been used but worse...my bookshelf has been tainted. Yes folks, my bookshelf was opened and closed while I was gone and I could tell the moment I walked through my damn door. Oh, so much drama, Mil!
Despondent, I looked around my room once again and felt incomplete. Nothing was mine yet everything was 'mine'. What do I have left. I guess all that's left, I realized, is what is inside me and around me. Not the material things, not the phsyical things. It feels *WARNING- major drama alert* like everything's been taken from me. But no matter how hard you or anyone else tries, you can't take the things that truly matter from me. You can't take myself away- my tears, my laughter, my sorrows, my joy, my pride, my sense of self, my essence. I have been left cold without everything but the knowledge that I have friends who care, everywhere I bother to look, their smiles, their stupid jokes, their comforting words, their little quirks- this warmth is what takes me through the day and the night.
No matter how hard you try, you can't take all this away, can you?

And that's what it's all about.